I sit on acid.

I was taking a poop in my new apartment today. My first poop in my new bathroom, actually. Because I am in the midst of moving in, I had no reading material to browse while "laying the stink-pipe," if you will. So, I hummed a song. A song I had not heard, or even thought of for many, many years. A song so ingrained into the subconcious of Americans you may not even realize that you know it, but you totally fucking do...



Well, there's my new local pizza joint.-BK

Something elusive and temporary.

I don't know why I'm so excited about this flick, but I am. A Disney/Pixar science fiction movie? Next to the new Batflick, this is my most highly anticipated movie of the year,

Apartment has been located.

Other than that, not much for today.

Livin' for tomorrow.-BK

Quietly Stormin'

Went out to see Funny Games yesterday. It's a very disturbing film. The suspense is immense and it requires, no... demands the full attention of the viewer. The villian breaks the "fourth wall" a few times, and it's never violent for the sake of violent. Actually, very little violence is shown on screen. I will have to remember to put this on the "best of" list come December. Tim Roth, the beautiful Naomi Watts, and Michael Pitt star.

I've been watching the 2 girls, 1 cup video a lot lately. Two of my friends recently discovered it, and have been raving about it. I can't get it out of my head!!! I will never think of a pint glass in quite the same way.

If you aren't familiar, this video is the end-all, be-all of disgusting internet videos. Your world view will forever be altered, you may not be able to sleep, and you might even get nauseated. I have the link if you want it, but you've been warned. I take no responsibility!

Up at the crack of ten today.

Hold on, I'm coming..-BK

Destroy everything you touch.

So I was going to make a brief appearance in Chicago for Easter, but ended up oversleeping, and missing the only open flight. So much for that.

I somehow hurt a rib/ab muscle dancing. If only I had rhythm instead of appearing to be having an epileptic seizure out there...

Still no new apartment. A little worried.

Kenny vs. Spenny is awesome. Watch it.

Nintendo music, yo.-BK

Not a suggestion, asshole!

I hate the rain.

Not going "home" for Easter. Don't need additional shit/issues/critics in my life right now. I was never big on Jesus anyways.

Sometimes you gotta fight fire with a fire extinguisher. Sometimes you gotta rip a smoke detector out of the wall. Often, you just gotta watch a grilled cheese a little closer/better.

Paul Newman is an emissary of Satan.-BK

Change this world.

Finally back on the stage. My God, it was awesome to be back up there. My set was only about 50% of what it should've been, but shit, I was just happy to rock and roll again!

Old people leave my life, new people break down the doors to come into it.

Been sleeping better.

Red Bell Pepper eaten raw is good. It goes well with some salad dressing, but beware, that shit is mad fattening, if you're that type of person, I mean.

Need to get oil changed. Overdue a tad.

Watched the sun go down today. Will watch it rise in a few hours. Poetic. All I'm missing is the 100k degree. Drats!

Broken, or just not strong enough?-BK

Shame on us, for all we have done.

Has anyone ever killed themselves whilst listening to Akon? Lord knows I came close today. Luckily, I was securely tucked in, and did not wish to get out of bed.

Cleaned the apartment today. Apparently the bedroom floor is carpeted. Damn.

I'm gonna try to finish this loaf of bread before it gets hard and/or moldy. It's going to be a busy week of grilled cheese, toast, and p, b, and j. Wish me luck and say a prayer/think a happy thought. It's cool though. I got like four kinds of cheese to eat.

My facial hair seems to be coming in a tad thicker these days. Psuedo-intellectual douchebag beard, here I come!

Dancing tomorrow. I need it. Need it badly. So badly.

Three flights of stairs is not always gonna be easy.

I will watch SNL tonight, just to remind myself of how self-confident, pretentious, and unfunny it has become.

Do it!-BK

I will crush your spine with Christ's love, brother!

Selling blood plasma. Hmm.. If someone can actually live off of the "fluid" that pumps through my veins AND I can make a little moo-la, what's the harm? I mean, homeless people do it all the time!

Apartment has been found. Application is being submitted tomorrow. Fingers are crossed.

Wanted a roomie, but none were found, or I was too late.

Slept 14 hours. Not well.

No big plans for this weekend. Just chilling out, maybe hawkin' some shit I don't need.

I woke up today, that's something, isn't it?-BK

I would cry for you, I would wash away your pain with all my tears, and drown your fear.

Shirley Manson is the most beautiful woman alive.

Only in America can a 22 year-old call girl be made into some sort of folk hero. Bottom line, she provides sexual pleasure for money. Think of that what you will. People do a lot worse to people for a little scratch, but, shit, if I was New York's governor, I probably could figure out a way to not pay 80k for sex.

Tomorrow is going to be a long, long day. Grrrr.

Writing again. Fuckin' eh!

Do we need to bring anything down?-BK

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I fucking hate apartment hunting. I fucking HATE apartment hunting! I FUCKING HATE APARTMENT HUNTING!!!!

Next Monday I return to the comedy stage. I am really excited. It has been entirely too long. I can feel it pulsing inside of me. Let's get it done!

I've been napping quite a bit lately. Good times.

Macaroni and cheese from the dollar store a concrete sign that you're living in poverty.

That peanut butter and jelly hit the spot, Kim. Thanks.

Shoulder is sore.

No, I'm not a college student.-BK

Shut your eyes and sing to me.

Sometimes, disabilities can totally kick ass!




Staying in PA-BK

I wanted to be with you alone, and talk about the weather.

Enjoying my day off of work this week. Drove around aimlessly for 25 minutes this morning, because I forgot that I was off of work today. Got up, got ready for work, into my car, onto the road, heading towards the airport, and then, ten minutes into my commute, erupted into a loud "MOTHERFUCKER!" Tragically, I cut short last night's drinking and social interaction, because I... thought I had to work today. It's not like I have a weird schedule, I'm off every Friday. What an idiot I can be sometimes. Jeepers!

Please, don't believe Southwest Airlines EVER flew planes they knew to be unsafe. This is not the case. Obviously, this is a developing situation, and things are still unknown, but I have personally never seen a plane allowed to fly simply to "avoid disrupting the flight schedule." Use your heads people, SWA has NEVER had a catastrophic incident, i.e. a crash. They are the safest, most reliable airline on Earth, flying, exclusively, the safest, most reliable aircraft on Earth, with the best, most experienced, Mechanics and Pilots in the industry, and as an Employee, stockholder, and fellow traveler, I urge you to continue flying aboard the red-bellied warbirds of the skies! I often take the time to thank Customers for flying on us, thanking them for paying my rent and car payment, for providing me with the ability to afford the life I lead. I am very concerned about the media's irresponsible "spin" of this story. The FAA should "man up" as well. Hopefully, we'll weather the storm, and learn a few things, as we always have in the past.

Look for me back in Chicago for Easter weekend. Party it up for the first zombie!

I'll be selling off some books today, because who reads anymore these days!?(I still do, and am simply trying to reduce a little clutter, that's all.)

Bike maintenance offers a Zen-like area of total relaxation for me. I enjoy it. Sometimes, I take apart my bike just for fun.

That's all folks.

No, actually, there are two previous films, one stars Vincent Price, the other stars Charleton Heston.-BK

Look behind you.

Today is my first double shift in about three weeks. Early conclusion: I do not enjoy doing double shifts!

I've been having some really fantastic, deep, thought-provoking conversations with some interesting people as of late. It's nice to know I am not alone in my peculiar interests and opinions.

Back to cold, wet, shit ass PA weather.

Hey Pittsburgh, here's how you get the under thirty crowd to stick around: Sign them to a 102 million dollar contract! Ewww.... I just made a sports joke.. so dirty.... ack!

One person will get the humor in the following. He knows who he is. This one's for you, hetero lifemate.

U.S. Techno-Industrial Base Eroding Due To Foreign Competition

Industry standard.

I spend far too much time on YouTube.



This is fucking comedy.

If your God was truly merciful, He would've taken Jim Belushi.

Life continues here in my world.

The sun was shining for nearly the whole afternoon today. People couldn't stop talking about it at the airport. That's how depressing working at an airport during the winter is. Take it.

I think I might kill myself before I even get the chance to vote. Seriously, Hilary Clinton is a cunt, That's right kids, a cunt. It's like how a dog can sense evil, something about her just makes the hair on my back rise. Shit, I don't even know anymore. My hand votes for Obama(John Edwards as a running mate?) but my body, my body's telling me "Yes, vote for Ron Paul!" Personally, I don't see anything wrong with a little crossin' party lines...

www.ronpaul2008.com

A fucking sports announcer dies in Pittsburgh, and you'd think they were having a funeral for a head of state. Christ.

Living arrangements are always changing.

The Bin Fairy provided me with a March 2008 Playboy. Playboy needs more genitalia. I like my pornography to really, really objectify and degrade women, and Playboy just don't cut it in my book, but shit, it was free, so like, whatever, you know?

For a money makin' playa who ain't with us no mo'!-BK