I don't associate with that element.

"Naw man, more like nuggets. Very solid. Uh huh, like lumps of clay. Yeah... I mean, I always eat a lot of cheese, but I gotta tell ya, it was at least a three day backup that came out. Plus, I'd drank whiskey and have eaten Mexican and Chinese food. Odd though, it wasn't smelly or a 'mega wiper'."

Nine Inch Nails are touring the United States of America this summer. Ben Kenny is traveling the United States of America this summer. Coincidence? Not a fucking chance. Time to paint my fingernails black and don the pants of leather and mesh shirt.

I cried in the shower yesterday. I am the very definition of manly, so it is a rare thing indeed for me to cry. But I was thinking of my dog yesterday. God I miss him. He was the best.

Spring is coming. I know this because the sun was peeking over the horizon at 6:30 this morning, as I was eating my nutrious, complete breakfast of a blueberry bagel, PayDay bar, canned orange juice, and Coke.

I will be making fewer social and comedy appearances this month in order to focus on the house stuff. Plus, I'm back to working 5 days a week, which puts me in bed at 9 most nights of the week.

I'm learning how to tie a Full Windsor. It's challenging, because I'm rather impatient and not very smart. I'm also on the prowl for a suitable suit. Everytime I find a good suit on sale, I'm still too hard up for cash. When I'm flush with dough, I always forget to go look. Life is a bitch.

I normally don't talk about Flight Attendants. I see them all the time. Most are nice enough people, and they do a hard, thankless job. But the one I saw this morning. Gee fucking golly was she hot! Southwest's uniforms are rather bland. They don't give men much to notice, save for the rare, well-tailored exception. This girl could wear that uniform. She wore it like a catsuit, and she had excellent proportions. All-American cheerleader style. I had to remember to keep breathing. I almost spoke to her. Almost. Just really cute, pretty even. Cute enough to make the cover of the perpetual issue of Barely Legal that sits on the coffee table in my head.

Another one of my cousins had a kid. My parents and grandparents best look in the direction of my sister's uteris, because I am not planting a seed. Ever, if I get my wish.

It was the album prior.-BK