I write to the world today from an almost utopian state of drunken bliss. I am very close to passing out, but my thought process seems to be relatively unencumbered by the alcohol, as I've been drinking a mere two beers an hour, but, I've been consistent. After all, valued motherfuckers and friends, it's been six hours of two beers an hour, which is twelve beers. Figure not much more food than a salad and mini pizza into the equation and you get a state of "the Gnar." The Gnar allows me to really let loose a little, not in typewritten form, mind you, but in a more, "loud, annoying-ass, neighbor" form. Fuck my neighbors, as they smoke a lot of dope, and know that I will not be reluctant to call the cops on them. I hope those bastard cocksuckers play another Linkin Park song. I double-dog dared them, but I seriously doubt they can make it happen.
Much closer to passing out now, as writing is thought consuming and challenging.
I would marry Melissa Auf der Mar.
Close friends of the hardcore Ben Kenny multimedia experience understand how significant this statement is. We would live in a very old building, and our spawn(children) would be classically trained in the bass, black arts, and financial speculation. I would eat her pussy everyday of the week, and twice on Sunday, you know, just to spit in God's face.
Ever seen Death Race 2000? It is perhaps the "blackest" comedy ever written. The gist is that drivers(in a dystopian future) get points for killing civilians. It's awesome, and makes me smile, and giggle a little. Find it on DVD.
They're "reimagining" it with Jason Statham, the lovely Joan Allen, and Ian McShane. It's should to be entertaining!
Go to Z-Lounge on Wednesdays from now on. Even if you don't live in Pittsburgh. Fly in. It's worth it.
Made of stars, so I'm gassy, to say the least.-BK
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