Time to up and quit this bastard.

If you're down, you obviously already own Zero 7's phenomenal new album The Garden. If not, I would highly suggest it's purchase. It's electronic, jazzy, groovy, sexy and generally really, really good. It's like your ears are eating candy but there's no stomachache tracks anywhere on this record. Tasty. Fucking tasty.

Friday is going to be fantastic. Fetish party AND the new Batflick. Holy white mohawk, shiny shoes, black latex necktie and gloves Batman!

I saw the most gangster-ass 747(older than me, I checked the registration) today at the airport. It was owned by Northwest Airlines and the Catholic diocese of Pittsburgh was making a chartered journey from PIT, to Hawaii, to somewhere in Australia. Those people must have unshakable confidence and belief in their moral superiority, as I would be very, very nervous flying on that sky-beast. It was leaking fuel by the gallon as well. Always a good sign.

This is Pittsburgh young/new comedians. I know you all got the fire, but there's nothing flammable in this town. Don't burn out. Keep the pilot on, and look towards the future. I opened my NEW YORK CITY savings account last month. I put virtually nothing in it, but it's better than an actual nothing. I will be moving there, in the very, very, distant but oh so tangible future.

If you don't attempt to live a dream, you aren't living, you're just mechanical.

Leg is back to about 80%, as is most of my Buddha-esque body. I throw bags in extreme weather with poor posture. I will never be 100% again. I sometimes worry about my future health, but then I think about my grandfather. He's into his eighties and "walks" a few miles every morning, mows acres of grass once or twice a week, plays tennis, and basically kicks the ass of everyone around him in terms of energy and general radness. He can even outdrink me. Until a few years ago, he had never been to a hospital for any sort of surgery. How did he make his living? He delivered appliances for decades. Not today's appliances either. We're talking lead-lined and cumbersome as hell, before the days of OSHA and worker's comp. I have 25% of his genetic build, and my other grandparents are/weren't slouches in the physical department either, so I'm kind of excited about being/growing older. My back hair is coming in nicely, and I'll have a sweet bald spot by 28 or so, so it's happening already.

How do I know I'm gettin' older?

There are people with driver's licenses who might not get the jokes in this:


I can see your point, but remember, I'm smarter than you.-BK