Giant Eagle droppings.

It feels so good to have a day off. In addition to being off today, I danced and hung out until about 3:30 AM last night, enabling me to catch around ten hours of sleep today. Waking up at 2pm is the best. Mostly because I know that I could have spent the time cleaning my house, exercising, looking at the porno mag I bought as the night ended, or writing stuff, but I just fucking slept. Sleeping makes me feel alive.

People always bitch about shopping for food on Sunday. I don't understand why. I spent about half an hour shopping today, and I found beautiful women in every aisle of the store. It's probably because I was following these two college girls, but still.

Another thing, if you have a daughter who is a "tween" don't let her fucking dress like she's in her twenties. My libido is strong, and I am morally weak, so beware!

Don't let her read Cosmopolitan either.


'Cosmopolitan' Institute Completes Decades-Long Study On How To Please Your Man

Hanging out a bit tonight and working all week long like a dog. The temperature seems to have cooled for a while, so that's something.

Smiling Moose show Tuesday night. I might not perform, but I will be in attendance. Tell me how much you love me and buy me a Dale's Pale Ale. The best canned beer I've ever tasted, I tells ya!

Here are three bits from the greatest comedian of all-time. Not my favorite comedian. The greatest comedian of all time. He is why I do comedy. He's been dead fifteen years and NO ONE HAS COME CLOSE TO HIS LEVEL. Denis Leary sucks!

Great.


This is perfection.


This is how you insult somebody. My favorite bit of all time. The very definition of "killing."


This blog has ended for today.

But, if there is no bread, how can you eat chicken patties??-BK